Lifeline: Struggling

Today and
Yesterday

I struggle

To Breathe
To Laugh
To Be

I am immersed in
doubt
of my own importance

I am overtaken by emotion

Can't control how I feel
How I deal with
the self-delusion
that I matter

Speaking truth
doesn't work
those words
don't get through

Words and more words

Feeling disturbed

So alone in a room full of people
As I talk to her and him
Loneliness still seeps in

I see you trying to break through the lies
but I am blocked and growing more tired
worn out from the fight of self vs. self

Feeling like a shell
who observes as she cracks

And Tomorrow...

                          Tomorrow never comes...